Rain (scatteredrain) wrote,

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Major Blah-ness

I don’t know why but for some reason yesterday I was extremely depressed. It just hit me out of nowhere. I didn’t wake up that way, just halfway through the morning I got extremely down. Today seems to be a little better so far. I guess it was just because there are SO many things going on this year and maybe at the time it felt a little overwhelming or something. I am not really sure. We found out how much we were going to be getting back on our tax returns and it was nearly what I thought it was going to be. That is probably what started it all I guess. I was really hoping to pay off a lot of our credit card debt with that but now that is out of the question if we want to have any kind of a trip planned in September. Plus I watched a Dr. Phil show not too long ago with people having money problems in there and the second couple reminded me of us not all that long ago and I NEVER want to go there again. However, with all the debt we have if one bad thing were to happen I guess we could easily end up there again. Issues with my weight aren’t any better. The reunion is going to be here before I know it and instead of losing anything I will have probably gained before it is all said and done. I have no discipline when it comes to money or food. I’m not sure where this comes from because my parents taught me otherwise. I guess I need to find the root of that problem in order to solve it. Then the looming date of my parents move gets ever closer. I guess the closer it gets the more I realize how much it is going to bother me when they go. I try my hardest not to think about it too much so off that topic right now. Plus my husband has been EXTREMELY busy with work lately. He has been bring stuff home to do because he doesn’t have enough hours in the day at work to finish everything. He was up until 2:00 a.m. last night working. Don’t get me wrong, I am thrilled that he even has work to be doing, however, having him come home and still have work to do really sucks. But with that I have had plenty of game play time I suppose.

I have no idea what my problem is. I just hope this crap doesn’t last very long. The last thing I need is a year of bad moods. I am sure my husband would be thrilled with that as well.

I finished part 2 of .hack Wednesday night. I hope to get the third one sometime today maybe. My husband will be working all friggin’ weekend so I need something to do. I should probably clean and get the house ready for our daughter’s party next weekend but I just don’t feel much like cleaning. Ah well. I wish I could go drown myself in a chocolate sundae or something but that would only make matters worse in the long run I suppose. I think after writing this I actually feel worse than I did before I started. Maybe I should have not said anything and just kept it inside. Who knows.
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